In chapter one we will look extensively at the INFANT STAGE of the baby boy. The infant must experience strong, loving, caring bonds with his parents. These bonds must meet his needs without his having to ask. He must receive life, and learn to express the life that is in him, to everyone’s delight. During infancy the baby learns to live joyfully in his mother’s world.
The first four years are the baby years. Babies need to receive all good things and learn to express themselves. Each baby learns the value of “just being me” without having to earn anything. During this time his identity will either be built around joy or fear. The child whose “backpack” is filled with joy becomes strong. He will not fear the trails or mountains.
Keeping baby from beginning a life of fear requires breaking life into baby-sized pieces. Each effort leads to letting baby rest in a timely way. The baby years are synchronized to baby’s needs. When life comes in his size, baby learns to synchronize and control his mind and emotions. He learns to quiet himself and soon is ready to synchronize himself with others. Relationships that are both joyful and peaceful result from getting his timing right.
These years of infancy prepare him for weaning. In our culture, weaning from the breast or bottle is rarely timed to coincide with when the child can take care of himself. We rush our children into independence as fast as possible. Weaning from infancy is the change from baby to boy. Once a baby has learned to take basic care of his needs, he can transform into a boy who can begin living in his father’s world. He moves from life in his home toward life in both his home and community. The goal for infancy is for babies to organize a strong, joyful, synchronized identity.
NEEDS
- Strong, loving, caring bond with parents.
- Face time (eye to eye) with mother and learn to experience and return to joy.
- Important needs are met without asking.
- Others take the lead and synchronize with him first.
- Quiet together time.
- Help regulating distress and emotions
- Be seen through the “eyes of heaven”
- Receives and gives life
TASKS
- Receiving with joy
- Learn to synchronize with others
- Organize himself into a person through imitation
- Learn to regulate and quiet every emotion and how to return to joy from every emotion
- Learns to be the same person over time
- Learn self care skills
- Learns to rest